THE DANMAN CAN

"Whoa now. The world's a pretty big place." "Made up of stupid little people." Much of what makes Gilda (1946) great (both the film and the character) and much of its legacy lives on the sex appeal of the bombshell-defined Rita Hayworth . The film is a very good noir as well—utilizing solid direction, lush cinematography, gorgeous gowns, and it's got the crime element, hard-biting humor, plus a ruthless love triangle—but it wouldn't be half of what it is without that particular "femme fatale" (though she isn't really). As well, there is an interesting (and uncommon, for the time) gay subtext running throughout this story of repressed desires, power dynamics, and the potent emotion that is hatred. To riff on the infamous introductory scene of the titular character, I don't know about "decent," but Gilda is definitely dazzling. Film Noir Feature Films Ranked

My least favorite Evil Dead  film so far, Evil Dead Burn (2026) is about 15 minutes too long (at 109 mins it's the longest ED ), has that drab grey look that too many modern horror movies do, is yet another horror-movie-as-trauma allegory (yes, I know many, even older, horror films are as well, but they didn't feel so on the nose about it), and uses far too much CGI (the finale is particularly poor, in that sense, and just in general). It also feels like the most mean-spirited ED picture, more in line with the  2013 reboot [ review ].  EDB is not without merit though—it contains a lot of great gore gags (many of which appear to be practical effects?), some innovative camerawork, and I enjoyed it just fine. Solid overall, but here's hoping  Evil Dead Wrath (a prequel set in 1972) is better. Evil Dead Franchise Films Ranked

"Cheeseburger." Horror, humor, drama, science fiction, and tragedy all blend together to near perfection in  David Cronenberg 's The Fly  (1986), celebrating its 40th anniversary in just a few weeks. With its disgusting, gooey, and amazing practical effects (courtesy of Oscar winner Chris Walas ), plenty of quotable dialogue, affecting performances by Jeff Goldblum and Geena Davis , a moving score by  Howard Shore , and more,  The Fly  is an all-time genre classic. "Spicy eggplant, champagne." If you'd like to hear to  Uncle Spooky , Lil Spooky , and myself talk about Cronenberg, take a listen to  Episode Twelve of the Weirdo Wednesday Podcast . David Cronenberg Feature Films Ranked Top 20 Directors The Danman Top 100 Films (2024 Edition) Top 10 Horror Films

Emilie Blichfeldt 's The Ugly Stepsister (2025) is a deliciously bent version of Cinderella , full of grotesqueries (via wonderful practical effects), lush cinematography, exquisite costume and production design, and an excellent score (whose anachronistic qualities I actually quite like; on that note, you gotta love a random Busby Berkeley -style sequence).  Disturbing yet beautiful, tragic yet hilarious, TUS is a visual feast, a subversive stab at the patriarchy (without being too on the nose; IYKYK), and an impressive feature film debut, with a fearless, committed performance by Lea Myren . A truly grim fairy tale. Recommended for fans of  The Substance  (2024) [ review ],  Pearl   (2022) [ review ] ,  Excision  (2012) [ review ],  Audition   (1999) [ review ], and  The Company Of Wolves  (1984) [ review ].

 "I sometimes hang awake at night dreaming of being spat at in the face." "How shall we fuck off, O Lord? "Out of the door, line on the left, one cross each." Terry Jones Films Ranked

"I love you. I loved you the moment I saw you. I'm mad about you. My little shoplifter. My sweet little pickpocket. My darling." Ernst Lubitsch Feature Films Ranked

"We all have our ghosts, Marshal." "God's got nothin' to do with it." Ted Post Feature Films Ranked

"You look like Pinehaven." "How does Pinehaven look?" "Well-tended." Lawrence Kasdan 's 1981 debut  Body Heat  is a neo-noir chock full of seductive dialogue, gorgeous compositions, and excellent early performances by William Hurt , Kathleen Turner (in her feature debut), and Ted Danson (who has a few very amusing scenes). Kasdan's sweaty, horny version of  Double Indemnity   (1944) [ review ] is perfect viewing for a 95° summer day.

"Friends don't have a pecking order." John Woo 's Bullet In The Head (1990) is a very good film overall, but I found it overlong, repetitive, and I wasn't in love with large swaths of the score. It's perhaps Woo's darkest and most downbeat (and certainly most pessimistic) picture. There are some truly affecting moments, with some expertly shot sequences, but it's also haphazard in its construction (kinda feels like three different movies mashed into one). The drama in BITH worked better for me than the action. John Woo Feature Films   Ranked

"What's the matter with you?! You wanna spend the rest of your life living out of a shopping cart?! We could be on top again. We could be drinking champagne instead of Night Train."